That Cat Lady

Had a lot of thought mulling around today, finally feel like i can blog. Everything was variations on a theme. For weeks, although particularly these few days, and even more today, i have felt very effing out of the loop. For weeks it was stuff like medical problems in the family, marriages, engagements, trips, all sorts of things my friends and family didn't bother filling me in on. Then for the past few days and especially today, big stuff was not even run past me, let alone was invited. And even before most of that occurred, i tried a little social experiment in the cafeteria for lunch. i sat by myself, and i did so at the start of lunch. For nearly the first half hour, not a single person same to sit with me or invite me to sit with them. In fact, almost no one said hey as they walked by. People looked for empty seats looking right over my head. Was amazing. Keep in mind, i am not in middle school, i go to a seminary of ministers in training... wow. The first person to finally come over after all that time was a guy who is not even on track for ordination, but a lay person who just wants more education. Great guy. I politely declined since i had to go to work soon after. Two guys did come sit with me after that, but mostly because i looked like i was the farthest from being done eating and they didn't wanna be left. i've never had self esteem issues, so i found the entire experiment fascinating.
i watched Without a Trace tonight, and it, like Law and Order sometimes, makes me think. They have these victims who disappear or die and no one notices they're gone or cares. They're missing a week or months or years and no one notices. My old youth leader used to fear that living alone with her cats, she'd die like the woman in the news. Old lady died and no one knew for weeks. Her cats ate her. i'm not worried that will happen to me, but if i can be so left out of the loop and so ignored, and i am a loud, noticeable, well-known guy... what about all the shy, quiet, not so noticeables?