Lifesaving stereotype...

It's very PiC (Politically inCorrect) to place any stock in stereotypes these days. Well let me correct myself, it's PiC to put stock in negative ones about minorities. White males are still fair game. Just watch TV. Any commercial with a goofball and a smart guy will typically have a black or Asian smart guy and goofy dumb white guy. Any commercial with a husband and wife will portray the wife as the smart one who knows about the right product or service and the husband (also usually white) as clueless.

Since whites are not going to be the majority in a few short years, but rather the plurality, i am interested to see if this will be the norm in 10 or 15 years. Will it be harder to make fun of white males since they too will be a minority, or easier since it's already the norm and the more marginalized you become, the harder to fight stereotype or injustice.

Today, a stereotype saved my life. i was riding my bike home from campus. As i pulled to the head of a street and was about to cross it and turn in, i saw a flashy new Lexus. i noticed that the man driving was wearing a nice striped polo and expenseive sunglasses. i autmotically assumed this was a man who was self-important and cluessless. i assumed that he wouldn't see me or pay attention and that even if he did, he wouldn't care or give me the right of way, despite his stop sign. i slammed on my brakes to wait, although i had the right of way and no stop sign. Lucky for me. Sure enough, he slowed for the stop sign saw no cars coming from his left (i was on the right) and pulled right on out. As he began to again pay attention to the direction his car was going, he saw me slammed on the brakes. He wasn't in danger of hitting me (he was a couple feet in front of me), but he didn't know if i was moving or stationary because he hadn't been paying attention. He then of course, glared at me. Anyone surprised? i wasn't.

Do i feel bad about stereotyping him? Yes. And why should i? Because society says so? Do i feel bad enough to change? Absolutely not. i like living too much for that. And for that, i make no apologies.

My Life...

Brief

i'll keep this brief because frankly, i am tired of defending McCain, or any republican candidate, but especially McCain. i'm just continually amazed at people who attack Palin's experience and defend Obama's. Is this a joke, seriously? She's worked her entire career in politics, not the "political arena," politics. Do you know the difference? Besides the fact that she's actually been present AND active. This is a big difference when compared to someone who hasn't been there for much of his very little political experience, and then didn't even vote most of those times. Do you realize how easy it is to have a job where you show up, sit in a chair and raise your hand at the right time? He couldn't even do that most of the time.

PS: You do realize she's the VP candidate, right? If Hillary can learn all she needs to know about being president whilst being first lady, me thinks Palin might learn a thing or two whilst being VP. Where's Obama's learning curve gonna be?

The Wrath of Grapes

i spent a summer in undergrad serving a small rural Baptist church down the highway from Enon College. Here, i got into a little trouble with the notion that drinking was not in fact evil or of the Devil. i'm afraid this was on instance where my Biblical knowledge was not welcome. Keep in mind, i was the president of Students Against Drunk Driving (SADD) in high school and i myself am not a drinker.

Indeed, there are many references in scripture to drinking. Some warn of the dangers, others not only extol it, but claim that wine and drink are gifts from God that show us how much he loves us. i can get on board with the modern day folk who say that the Biblical wine was likely watered down, but i can't at all believe those that perpetuate the myth that the Biblical wine was non-alcoholic. Were that the case, there would be no need for verses about drunkeness or drinking wine in moderation. Anyone remember the story of Pentecost? The crowd immediately blamed their speaking in tongues on wine. Would non-alcoholic wine have this effect?

To my delight, the AJ Jacobs book i'm in the midst of reveals an expert on the subject, a Christian oenophile, Daniel Whitfield. These are the results of his exhaustive research on wine and drink in the Bible...

On the negative side, there are 17 warnings against abusing alcohol, 19 examples of people abusing alcohol, 3 references to selecting leaders, and one verse advocating abstinence if drinking will cause a brother to stumble. Total negative references: 40, or 16 percent.

On the positive side, there are 59 references to the commonly accepted practice of drinking wine (and strong drink) with meals, 27 references to the abundance of wine as an example of God's blessing, 20 references to the loss of wine and strong drink as an example of God's curse, 25 references to the use of wine in offerings and sacrafices, 9 references to wine being used as a gift, and 5 metaphorical references to wine as the basis for a favorable comparison. Total positive references: 145, or 59 percent.

So eat, drink and be merry... for tomorrow we may die...

Memory

September 11th. i almost didn't realize it was today. It has only been 7 years and it didn't even occur to me until i saw the date today. i guess a lot has happened in 7 years. i was a senior in high school when the attacks occurred. i was in my AP Biology class when the teacher next door came in. She was like a drill sargent, always barking things at students, a stoic, hardened older woman. She came in, tears coming down from behind her thick glasses. She told us what had happened and to turn on the news. We saw one of the towers in flame. Suddenly a second plane hit as we were watching. We watched for awhile in shock and then turned it off. The other teacher came back in and said one of the towers had fallen. We turned it back on and saw the second tower fall.

Our teacher, Ms Driscol, said that there were more important things in the world than AP Biology and ignored the instructions from the principal to turn off the news and go about business as usual. i've never been more thankful. We needed to watch that and remember it. We still do. i think people were right to say the best way to move on is to live a normal life, but we have to remember. Someone said once that history doesn't repeat itself... but it does rhyme. This is true and perhaps one of the best reasons to remember it.

News 'creep'-ing in...

Yes, today's creepy news...

http://www.lifegem.com/index.aspx?BannerType=QuigoText&BannerMessage=LoveLivesOn.

That's right folks, turn your loved one into bling, ice, floss, sparkle, rock, a girl's best friend...

Quick Thought

Caught most of a new show tonight between my Greek translations. An interesting thought was posited by one of the characters. The gist of which is...

Science and technology have both advanced so far, and at an exponential rate. They may both now be beyond the ability to be monitored or controlled by the people whose interest/responsibility it is to do so.

A simple update on my complicated schedule

i realized i haven't let many people know about my upcoming school year. When i was a senior in college, i thought i had experienced my last first day of class (i hoped). However, i hadn't officially decided on seminary. TOMORROW (God willing) is my LAST... FIRST day of class. i graduate in May (we hope).

To do this, i am technically overloading this semester. For us, three classes is a full load and 4 (or 3 plus a year long internship) is maximum. i am taking 3 classes and interning at St. Mary's as Chaplain for my CPE (clinical pastoral education). Unlike most CPE programs, mine is squeezed into September-Jan instead of Sept-May (which most of them are). So, technically, both of my CPE credits land on this coming semester, putting me at 5 credits in theory. i had to get special permission.

i am taking the first half of my New Testament class now that i've had Greek. i am taking a class called Evangelism in the Congregation which will take a look at how to do that and how it is and has been done in the past. i will also take one called Images of Jesus which will take a look at Jesus as pictured and imagined in art and media, including cinema and TV over time.

i'll also be exploring a Direct Study idea for January with a professor on Pastoral Care to Adolescents.

What does this mean practically? i'll have 3 courses that take up about 6 hours of class each week, plus their workload. They say to estimate 2 hours of work for every 1 you're in class. Then, i have 6 hours of class each week for CPE and must perform 17 hours of clinicals each week (hours in the hospital visiting patients.

Since Ashley and i share a car that she drives to work and the hospital is 6 miles away, i'll be trying to schedule my massive hosptial hours for weekends and an evening or two. Suffice as to say, i'll be mondo busy. Please don't take it as a sign that i don't love you if i can't visit or see or spend time with you this semester. i would almost certainly rather be with you!

i'll also be unofficially job hunting all this semester and officially start some time next semester when i am certified ready to receive a call. If you're the praying sort, now's a good time to start ;-)

PS: i also got a steroid shot this week to combat the lingering effects of the poison oak i got a month ago after 2 rounds of steroid pills. That stuff is evil!

Separation of Church and State

"There is no greater violation of the theory of separation of Church and State than for the State to take on the mantle and responsibility of the Church."*



*This statement should not lead you to conclude that i believe that the actual premise of separation of Church and State is found in the Constitution.

The first half of Hawaii

i only blogged on the second half of our Hawaii trip. It was all i had been able to type up while we were there. The rest of it was handwritten by me and Ashley. So i transcribed it...

Sunday- We landed a little ahead of schedule after a long flight. We checked into our hotel and then got dinner with Ashley's cousin, Clara, at the Like Like (lee-kay lee-kay) Diner. We had a great time and then Clara took us back to her place, this fantastic studio apartment above a pool house and by a large garden and stream. Windows covered the back wall and Geckos covered those. Vents above the windows carried in the sound of the babbling stream down below and almost sounded like rain. Ashley zonked and Clara and i stayed up late talking and getting to know each other. She's in school at U of Hawaii, studying drama. We headed back to the hotel pretty late.

Monday- We got up around 7 and went in search of breakfast. We hadn't bought groceries yet. (we ate cereal in the room most of the rest of our stay) We found a little coffee shop, but it was only cold breakfast and gelato. However, the owner could tell we wanted hot food, so he told us about a local favorite diner down the road, which we walked to, Eggs 'n Things.

They had seriously the best pancakes either of us has ever had. Ashley had them with eggs and i had them with eggs and spam. WOW to the spam too, not kidding. Even Ashley had to agree. On the way back to the hote we stopped into several shops. Ashley headed up to the room and i wandered into crazy shirts. i talked at length with a local in the store, Devynne, who recommended Kailua beach, so we went. It was great! We got a little mixed up with directions and Ashley got us a little turned around in a neighborhood. i then got us to the Marine base. Go figure. A nice Marine at the gate gave us directions to public beach access.

This beach had soft white sand and the water was warm (the water at all the other beaches seemed mild colder to me). We found some pieces of coral and swam for a bit. We headed back into Honolulu and went to Walmart for groceries. Then we hit the streets for some browsing and some gelato (from the nice shop where they told us about Eggs 'n Things).

We headed to the recommended Irish pub and restaurant, Murphy's in the financial district. The food was delicious. i had a steak with the best sauce/gravy. One of the five best/most tender steaks i've ever had. Ashley had the crab and shrimp sandwich. Amazing fries too for her and fresh, gravy covered mashed potatoes for me and an amazing veggie medley with green beans and carrots and cucumber (cucumber is in every vegetable mix at every restaurant in Hawaii). We finished the evening by watching Jurassic Park in the room in preparation for the ATV rides at Kualoa Ranch the next morning.

Tuesday- We headed up the road to Kualoa Ranch, took pics along the way. The ATV rides were great. There was a group of 8 and us plus a couple from Europe, so we were paired with that couple, so we were paired with that couple. He was from Great Britain and she from Italy, maybe our age. Our tour guide was a teenage Hawaiian, Shylah.

She took us up to a bluff too small for most groups. From there, we could see the valley where they filmed a battle (w/live ords) in Wind Talkers and the mountain of Mighty Joe Young. i took panaramic shots.

Shylah picked us fresh guavos along our route, which we also ate, skin and all. Tasty! :-) We also saw a hillside bunker that was in Pearl Harbor. The terrain was gorgeous. i did get yelled at once for being a little too rowdy on my ATV, but he gave me a smile after and a hang loose.

When we got back, we had lunch outside and i drove so Ashley could take pics. We stopped for a few minutes at the little park across the way for some palm tree waterfront shots in front of what might be Chinaman's Cap? Then we stopped at the Macadamian nut place, Tropical Farms. We tasted the coffee, got nuts and souvenirs and saw pics of Barack Obama's recent visit to the farm. Then we stopped a little farther down the road and got fresh bananas that were delicious! 50 cents

[Somewhere in here we slipped out to Pearl Harbor and out to the USS Arizona Memorial]

We ate in the room and then drove up towards Hanama Bay looking for a spot to swim. We stopped at a scenic overlook that was a rock outcropping a little bigger than a football field out into the ocean. i climbed down and out where this lone fisherman was. Ashley took lots of pics and then we explored the whole thing.

We drove another couple hundred yards and i spotted a tiny cove. It was just a mile or two before a public beach at Sandy Point. We parked on the side of the road and climbed down to it. There was a middle-age couple just leaving. We pretty much had it to ourselves then. It had a 15 foot wide sandy beach and was surrounded by a crescent of rock outcropping. There was a cave up on the beach that went all the way under the road. We swam for an hour or so and then drove back to the hotel.

We were exhausted, so we wanted to go to dinner nearby. The Japanese place was very expensive and Ashley wasn't in the mood, so she took me to Planet Hollywood, which i had never been to. It was a lot of fun. i had the biggest, tastiest loaded Texas nachos i've ever consumed. i suddenly like guacamole and sour cream? Then we crashed.

Wed- We headed to Honalulu's Aloha Stadium for 45 minutes at the Swap Meet and jetted back to the hotel for our pick-up. Our catamaran captain, Captain John, only had us to pick up for his boat and so he took us on a tour through Alamoana Beach Park. He told us all about the Banyon Trees, with vines that grow down from the branches to the ground to form new trunks. It's wild. He also gave us the skinny on what to do where and where to eat. He was a pro windsurfer from Seattle and moved down to Hawaii and now does this. Nice business. The boat was beautiful. He was pretty funny, dry wit. Some kid asked about the name of the boat, the Makani. He said, "It's Hawaiian for 'no refund.'" It actually means wind.

The cruise was great. We saw sea turtles and lots of fish, no mermaids. We also saw the Junk Boat. We then went to the Swap Meet again for and hour and then back to the hotel for the time share presentation which scored us $100 gift certificate that we used at Crazy Shirts and on dinner with Clara at Keoni's by Keo (Thai). That food was spectacular. i had a seafood medley of shrimp, scallops, and crab with veg and rice in hot sauces; Ashley had fried rice and chicken; and Clara, the salmon in coconut milk and ginger. It was a late dinner and we lingered with Clara, so we crashed back home again.

More on the Anti-pro-life Movement

This was inspired by a conversation with a friend of mine. If you're offended by the blog title, feel free not to read this, but i'm doing my best to get through an entire book with an oposing view, so you'll probably survive my blog entry.

i'm currently reading Thy Kingdom Come: How the Religious Right Distorts the Faith and Threatens America, an Evangelical's Lament.

The book is interesting. Some of it is lacking in thought. It's a typical uber liberal who doesn't understand the conservative mindset at all and has made no real effort to see things from that perspective. It's just as frustrating from the opposite side too. He goes on and on about how the Bible has nothing to say about abortion. He says this because he doesn't consider abortion killing or murdering someone. If you're a super conservative, you see it as exactly that. So then the Bible has lots to say about abortion. It's all in how you define it. i am probably more frustrated on this topic than any other topic. NO ONE in the medical field can precisely determine when a fetus becomes a "person." There's no exact day or moment. For practical purposes, they define an early stage and late stage and when it's legal to "terminate/kill" a fetus. However, every doctor will tell you that there's no magical day they SUDDENLY become a "person." Just like no sudden day you're no longer a kid or no exact moment you become elderly. It's developmental. So from a purely secular stand point, there's no way to determine when a baby is a legal person because you can't declare when they suddenly become a person and stop being a fetus which apparently is not alive.

Some medical experts will say it's when the baby can live without the mother's help. Well excuse me, but that's not until a kid is 5 or 6. No 3 or 4 year old could survive alone in the forest or on the street. They'd be killed or starve to death. What about being able to breathe on its own or biologically survive outside the womb? Well, many full-term babies are unable to do that. And many premature babies need the same care. As medical advances get better, babies can survive younger and younger. Does an advance in medicine change the definition of when someone is a person?

Ugh. If the medical profession can't agree on any magic moment, then the best you can do is say conception, at least as a secular person. And the Bible says that God knits us together in our mother's womb. So from a faith-based point of view, the same is true.

This is usually the point where an anti-pro-life person will launch into all the practical reasons why it should be legal. They'll talk about incest and rape and teenage mothers, etc. These are all tragic cases and the require compassion and sympathy and more than a firm no. They'll talk about back-alley abortions, etc. The same people who think that we can solve war and racism and sexism and genocide homophobia with words and societal pressure and discussion and love and compassion and understanding don't think we can do the same for mothers of unplanned pregnancies. They don't think maybe a society open and accepting and supportive of adoption could change all that. Why would it work for problems as big as abortion and hatred and genocide and not for unplanned pregnancies?

Mostly, these arguments come up when they don't want to discuss how tricky it is to label a fetus and when it becomes a person. That's too hard to accept. They want to discuss how it's a woman's choice and a woman's body, etc. Well, we live in a society that believes your rights only extend as far as they don't hurt or infringe on the rights of others. We are a society whose very first amendment is the right to free speech, and YET we limit it. You cannot yell fire or bomb in a crowded theater because it would endanger people or incite a riot. We don't even have the freedom from harm or danger or fear in our constitution or amendments, but we uphold it OVER one person's right to yell a particular word. Is not protecting the rights and life of a baby more important than the right or choice of someone to a certain lifestyle or body choice?

i know it is not easy for anyone deciding about abortion. i have had friends face those tough choices. But when you think about all the issues, it's much much harder, although maybe it's harder because the right thing to do is easier to see. i think most people try to avoid that. i think my own responsibility as a Christian is to help build a Church and a society that accepts, supports, and loves the mothers, families, and children of unplanned pregnancies. i think THAT's what Christ calls us to do.

Book Hunting

If you're in college or grad school, this post is a MUST READ.

i spent most of College trying to figure out the best way to buy books cheaply. Amazon frequently didn't have the books i needed 6 years ago or they took so long to arrive that it wasn't worth it. Our reading lists weren't always available until right before classes started. In addition, my parents gave me book money the first couple of years of college and they put it in my student account instead of giving me the cash, so online wouldn't have worked.

i typically rushed over to the student book store as soon as they listed all the books, then wrote them all down with their prices. Then i'd run to the other bookstore in town, compare prices and buy the cheaper ones. Then i'd head back and buy what was left at the student store, hedging my bets on the used ones. It was pretty crazy.

The internet is slowly catching up with the needs of students. This year's book buying was aided largely by the extreme ingenuity of my fiscally savvy wife.

Option 1
To begin with, Ashley posted all my needed books on Paper Back Swap. This is a particularly good site for those of you with mounds of books you are looking to get out of the house or access to mounds of books you're trying to get rid of. It works like this... you join and list all the books you're trying to get rid of. This gives you a certain amount of credits. Every book is worth 1 and every audiobook is 2. For every book requested from you, you get a credit to spend. So each time someone asks for your book, you get a chance to ask for others. It's not your best bet for time crunch, but if you know any ahead of time or they're not being used until later in the semester, free is cheapest.

Option 2
We all know and love Amazon for the used and new for dirt cheap. Most of us also have gone to Half.com and AbeBooks. However, the best option is www.AddAll.com. Why? You plug in the title or ISBN or anything else, just like those other guys and it searches through 30 or 40 sites and finds the lowest price (including the shipping and handling).

Option 3
Many of you may not be aware, but there are free bookstores where you can borrow books for a couple of weeks. You can't write in them and you have to return them, but this is a good option for you if you have no desire to highlight or keep the book. They are called libraries. Check it out.

Hawaii

i'll transcribe my written notes on Sunday through Wednesday soon, but here is Thursday through Saturday...

Thursday - We got up to have our North Shore day. I drove us up the center of the island to Shark’s cover, a good hour or so. We rented masks, snorkels, and fins from a little shack and headed across the street to Shark’s Cove to snorkel. We had trouble getting in since it’s a very rocky and treacherous beach entry, but once in, we swam for an hour or two around the huge cove and took lots of underwater pics. Not sure how well they’ll turn out, but it was lots of fun.

When we got out, we scoped out a nearby cove, where Ashley went wading and picture taking and I went rock hopping out on a long rock outcropping, where I found a cool isolated pool and took a swim. Ashley got pics. We also saw this beautiful golden swimming with his owner as she snorkeled. We were pretty hungry by then, so we drove into town to hit the places we’d been recommended. Captain John had told us about Kua Aina for lunch and we went and had the best fish burgers ever. I have never had such a good burger ever in my life, or fish for that matter. I had a Mahi Mahi burger on Kaiser with some special sauce and jalapeno Tabasco and tomatoes and lettuce. Ashley had the tuna, which was also really good. We split a basket of these fantastic homemade fries, the skinny, super greasy kind that are all stringy and crispy on the outside.

The travel channel (and every single person who we told we were headed to the North Shore, both in stores and restaurants) recommended Matsumoto’s as the MUST VISIT for the North Shore, or even all of Hawaii. It’s shaved ice, and a local legend and landmark. They do shaved ice with various flavors. You can get it with vanilla ice cream in the bottom or without. And you can get it with or without the sweet red beans. Yes, beans, cooked beans. I got it with both the beans and ice cream since I knew I’d only be here this once. It was alright, but admittedly, I am no shaved ice king. Ashley loved it (although she didn’t get beans). We hit up one of the local shops and I talked at length with this local mom, Cindy, who owned the shop about faith and work and astrological signs while Ashley tried on dresses.

We went back down the road towards Shark’s Cove and stopped at what might have been Table Top, a long narrow sandy beach that becomes slippery, algae covered rocks immediately. For a quarter mile, sea turtles were trying to come in for the algae. There were no signs where we were and so I got in and fed algae to several turtles and touched a few before a local came over and told us that we were supposed to give them their space, but we got lots of cool pics before that. They are beautiful creatures.

We found some space to get in and swim for a bit. The water was colder and had quite an undertow. Then we headed to town again for dinner. We had already done Irish, so we had ruled out Jameson’s as recommended by Cpt John and we tried for the Sushi place where you can sit on the floor at low tables, but they were running a fundraiser, so we drove back down the road. I spotted Cindy in her parking lot, shutting down the store, so we stopped and asked her advice. She directed to us to Rosie’s Cantina, which she mentioned had good “seafood.” This consisted of the night’s special of fish tacos and a shrimp appetizer. The rest was Mexican, and a bar, but it was very good. They had homemade chips and salsa and I did get the fish tacos, which were fresh, local mahi mahi and some amazing ranchy sauce and beans and rice. It was pretty fantastic and hit the spot. It was pretty late when we got home and crashed.

Friday- We got up and made our way to the Ala Moana Park for beach time. We swam a little and then got hot dogs for a mid morning brunch in the park. They were huge yummy jumbo dogs, about a foot long and hanging off both ends of the buns. Then we sat in the shade of a coconut tree and read. Then I went back in and swam out to the reef and back a few times. It was only about 150 yards out, but nowhere to touch down till you get there and the reef itself is very sharp, so you have to swim back after a quick break. We lounged a little more before heading back to the hotel. We tried to get into the Hilton Hawaiian Village to see penguins, but the parking itself was a zoo and very expensive, so we nixed it. We also wanted to hit Helo Hattie’s before our Luau.

We got to Helo Hattie’s and they gave us shell lei’s. I wasn’t super impressed. It was just a large gift shop. A little overhyped, I think. However, they have a jewelry counter where you can pay 15 bucks to open an oyster and see if it has a pearl. If it does, it’s yours and they will sell you a mounting for a necklace or ring or earrings if you so desire and mount it on the spot. We weren’t especially interested, but they had these keys you could try for opening a treasure chest. Mine didn’t work, but Ashley’s did and she fished out a coupon for half off the pearl thing, so she tried it. You have to tap it three times and shout “Aloha!” And she not only got a pearl, but the pretty, much sought-after pink pearl, and a good size. So Ashley decided to make this her big honeymoon purchase and we got it set in a ring. Because we bought it, the lady gave us another oyster to try. It not only had a big pink pearl, but it had two! That’s apparently quite rare and we had them bagged up for later. They might go to a little girl in several years with a fun story of how they’re connected to mom’s ring. I got a burnt orange t-shirt with a turtle on it.

We headed to the luau and it was very nice. We got to see hula lessons and take a shot at throwing spears and stuff. We made palm-frond head bands with flowers with one of the islanders and Ashley made a bracelet. I got an island-tattoo of a turtle in some sort of drawing pencil that has yet to wash off after a swim and bath, although it is much faded. We also saw a guy climb straight up the trunk of a 40 foot coconut tree and throw flowers all over all of us below.

The meal was wonderful, especially the pit cooked pig. They do the whole buried pig with hot stones inside for 8 hours and then pull the pork. On rice, it was fabulous. I was less impressed with the egg fried fish. The luau hula show was beautiful and the fire twirler guy was incredibly impressive. We sat between a group from Australia and another of mixed Hawaiian and Tennesseans who were celebrating the night before a wedding between their two families. It was a lot of fun. We headed back to the hotel and finished off the night with a nice sit on the balcony and the bottle of sparkling cider the front desk gave us when we checked in.

Saturday- We got a later start this morning and headed over to the swap meet again. It was the first time we had no fixed end time and could meander. We finished off our souvenir shopping for folks back home and Ashley finally got an Indian silk wrap skirt from recycled sari material. She’s been searching since high school and the one she found is gorgeous. We headed back to the hotel and finished off our leftovers from Planet Hollywood and began packing. Then we went out to the beach in front of our hotel group, which was by far the worst beach we’ve been to. It was tiny, crowded, and very rocky once you were in. We didn’t spend long there and then came back to the room to read on the balcony.

We did an early dinner, too early as it turned out. Roy’s, another recommendation from Captain John, was not quite open for dinner, so we put our names in and wandered down to this art gallery. The paintings of a local Romanticist artist were on display, all ocean scapes and cliffs from Hawaii. It’s the first time landscapes have ever caught me so dramatically. The woman in the store had moved here only a year ago from the west coast and told me all about the artist. Turns out she is originally from Austin. The artist moved here 20 years ago to study art and first displayed his paintings on the fence down the road at the Zoo, where many artists still do on Saturday evenings. He used to sell his paintings for 20 dollars, with a frame and box. Now, he has $175,000 painting on the wall in the gallery and people buy them like crazy. I’ve never seen such beautiful frames either, all made from local Kua wood.

Dinner at Roy’s was amazing. It was probably our nicest meal here, a good one to end on. Roy’s is Hawaiian fusion. There’s all kinds of seafood and sushi and sashimi. Originally, Ashley was skeptical that there wasn’t anything really amazing to be had. Neither of us was in a big fish food mood. However, she got the ABCLT sushi, which was avocado, bacon, two kinds of crab, rice, lettuce and tomato. I sampled some and I can honestly say I’ve never ever had sushi that good, that quality, or that well put together. I had stuffed blue crab with some sort of sweet glaze that just sort of melted in my mouth like warm butter, and wasabi. It was incredible. We also split a flourless hot chocolate soufflé. It was molten deliciousness with vanilla bean ice cream on the side. Probably one of the 10 best desserts of my life.

Being us though, this wasn’t enough. We went to Cold Stone with our two for one coupon and got ice cream. I got a variation on one of their specials, vanilla ice cream mixed with apple pie filling, crushed graham crackers and cinnamon. Ashley had a chocolate chip cookie dough mixture thing and gave me her whip cream. We packed a little more and then headed out to try and find the salux back washer things her mom has been asking for.

Perfect

The Results are In...

...And they are fascinating. i'm sure most, if not all of you who ever read this had time to read/participate in the semi-scientific poll on the right column of this blog that has been up for a few months now. i did take Statistics in high school, so i'm aware that it's not the most unbiased random sample, though i have quite a conglomerate of vastly different associates and many of them had friends take it whom i do not know. It'll serve our purposes.

i start the apologies here:

If you disagree that it moderately represents our country, that's fine. However, i think the conclusions largely hold true, regardless of the exact numbers. i also apologize if the following conclusions grossly misrepresent you if you took the poll or if it bothers you to realize some of things i'm about to point out. This is possibly inflammatory. The following is intended to incite discussion, not conclude it...


Now. As to be perfectly clear, i will take you through each question and the conclusions. Questions:

Should marriage be legislated by moral constraints in the US?
What is the best way to determine who should be able to marry?
Should first cousins be allowed to marry in the US?
Should brothers and sisters be allowed to marry in the US?
Should Aunts/Uncles be able to marry their blood-related nieces/nephews in the US?
Should parents be able to marry their blood-related offspring in the US?
Should men/women be able to marry more than one person in the US (polygamy)?
Should same sex marriage be legal in the US?

With the exception of question 2, each question provided the options of:

Yes
No
State Issue- In my state, Yes
State Issue- In my state, No


If you read current research on the topic, you'll find that first cousins can marry and produce healthy offspring. This is why many states allow it. Additionally, it has been argued by many that sex is not the only reason to get married, and in fact no current laws require it or monitor it. Many have argued that couples have less sex after marriage, and there are certainly people who cannot have sex due to health or handicap concerns. All of the questions were about marriage laws, and not sex laws, which maybe should be discussed later.

This brings me to my first major point: every instance in questions 3 through 8 discuss whether or not to allow the marriage of one or more persons to another. All of them are strictly moral decisions. You're welcome to argue the point, but each and every one of them, whether you believe yea or nay, in this country or your state, it's a moral judgment call.

Why so interesting? In question 1, only 38% of the people said they think marriage should be legislated by moral constraints. However, a no answer on any of the questions that followed was a moral constraint. Guess what percentage would ban marriage based on moral constraints for the following groups:

First cousins: 84%
Brothers and sisters: 96%
Aunts/uncles and blood-related nieces nephews: 99%
Parents and blood-related offspring: 92%
Polygamy: 74%
and...
Same sex: 26%

So, the 72% who say no to moral constraints on marriage in the legal system? There's been a lot of talk in the media about "legislating morality." My suspicion for quite some time has been that many more people are comfortable with doing just that than will readily admit or even realize.

Aside from the final question on same sex marriage (which like it or not falls into the same category as the other questions as a moral decision), the majority of people who don't want the government going around legislating morality when it comes to marriage, are willing to say, "well, except here and here, and maybe over there. What? Gay marriage, no leave that one alone. i don't like forcing people to legally conform to my morals or someone else's."

i'm not passing judgment here. i'm merely asking everyone to stop and think about what it means to say one thing over here, and the opposite over there.

On top of all this, i find it fascinating that so many people are down on the cousin lovin' (84% oppose) and that more people are opposed to aunts marrying their nephews (99%) than parents marrying their own offspring (92%). This compared to the 26% ready to throw a parade for the polygamists and 74% for same sex marriage. Again, my opinion isn't relevant or nearly as interesting as those numbers.

Question 2, about the best way to determine who should be able to get married has its own fun intricacies. The options were:

Only an age requirement: 66% in favor
Parental consent: 6%
Psychological evaluation: 6%
No requirement: 24%

Side-stepping the issue of the moral judgments involved in psychology, 72% were in favor of deciding this on the basis of age or parental consent, both moral constraints. Some societies believe 12 is the age of reason, others 16 or 18. In the US, you are able to reasonably choose a political candidate or go to war at the age of 18, but cannot reasonably choose to consume or not consume alcohol until the age of 21. Again, the 72% in favor of moral constraints here in qeustion 2 is nearly twice that of those who said they believed the opposite in qestion 1. This is fascinating.

Additionally, while the age varies from state to state, between 14 and 18, and most states allow younger with parental consent, what makes this age magical? It can be argued that many people over the age of 18 do not posses the mental faculties that prepare them for marriage, or perhaps parenthood. Mentally handicapped people and people with psychological problems can legally marry. And apparently, you are more prepared to get married if your parents (who may or may not be trained psychologists, the law is quite nonprejudicial here) say so. The state often decides on a case by case basis (and psychologists are always part of this process) whether to try children as adults for crimes. Why not for marriage? Because age is not a magical number that automatically presents a person with reason and cognitive ability.

Maybe these were too many issues to tackle and maybe my conclusions are entirely erroneous, but my hope is that you can look at both these numbers and your own beliefs, as well as the beliefs of your friends and begin to tackle these questions in a new way. If you took this poll and are completely satisfied with your answers with no struggle or hesitation, i won't hesitate to say that you have a lot of work to do. Even i struggled with this poll and i wrote it.

Please feel free to respond to this in part or in whole. My sincere thanks to the people who participated, both in the poll and in the process of critically thinking about these topics.

Rules of Acquisition...

It has been said that there are five stages to acquisition: infatuation, justification, appropriation, obsession and resale. i think this is extraordinarily true in this culture. We see items we can't live without, we rationalize why we need
them, we acquire them, we enjoy them, telling ourselves what a wise purchase it was (of course this period is shorter with food, drink, drugs, etc), and then we often regret owning them, or more often that we have spent money that we can't spend on the next infatuation.

Now, while this was meant to describe merchandise, i think that in our culture, we extend the stages to other things, hobbies for instance, or interests. My dad jumps from one hobby to another, exhausting everything there is to know and perfect, and then drops it. Some stick around much longer than others, but only one at a time gets full interest. i do the same thing sometimes with books and television shows. My sporadic intensity with working out over the past 5 years and then lapsing as i get busy with something else is evidence of this.

i also think people in our culture frequently go through these stages in relationships. This is not to say that we're not capable of having long term monogamy, but how many people in this country marry the first person they date or have all the same friends they did in childhood? Think about it. We become interested in someone. At some point, there is a higher threshold to holding onto this person than our average peer and we want to keep them, so we try harder or work at a relationship or give of ourselves, our time, our money, etc. We justify it by deciding we get as much out of the relationship or more than we put into it. Through this process we actually appropriate the friend or significant other. At this point, we revel in it. We rely on this person, confide in, and love them. At some point, we tire of them or don't want to put in the same effort or regret having to apply so much effort to what used to be easier or yield more satisfaction and regret we can't spend our resources elsewhere.

This is probably part of why half of all marriages end in divorce, and i suspect that this is why in our culture, friendships die at such a high rate. i would be incredibly curious to see the numbers on "friendship divorce." i think that the friendships and marriages that last are when people get to the resale stage and reinvest. They decide that the best use of their resources is to apply them where they initially began. This reinvestment may cost more than going elsewhere, but they also know more about what they'll gain from it. In some ways, it's a safer bet. In some ways, it's a very brave thing because if both parties aren't interested in this reinvestment, it goes badly.

i dislike thinking about human relationships in monetary terms or investment strategies, but i think that may be why i often don't understand why people give up on relationships. We live in a world and society where investment is a more comprehensible idea than love. Investments change from day to day. Love is unchanging. It is unselfish each day.

Well, as the bumper sticker says:

Apples to... chickens?

It's one thing to compare apples to oranges, but what about apples, carrots, and tomatoes to... chicken. McDonald's is running a commercial touting their super healthy... deep-fried chicken nuggets. They're ALL WHITE MEAT! The commercial is full of various fruits and veggies... oh! Aaaaand a quick glimpse of the all-white meat chicken nugget. Seriously? Do we take this kind of advertising for granted these days? Would you bat an eye?

Decisions, decisions...

Reason- a basis or cause, as for some belief, action, fact, event, etc.

Excuse- an explanation offered as a reason for being excused; a plea offered in extenuation of a fault or for release from an obligation, promise, etc.

Forgiveness- the act of excusing a mistake or offense

Punishment- a penalty, imposed for a crime, fault etc.

As part of a society, we have police officers, prison guards, judges, and prosecutors who represent us, as much as possible, without passion or prejudice. Their job is to be the mechanism that investigates, sentences, and punishes those who harm part or all of society. They are not usually directly involved with the case or one of the victims and the system is designed to try and prevent that. Because of this, they institute punishments against people who have not personally wronged them. Though they might not like the criminal, they do not have to have any feelings at all to carry out the punishment. One does not have to harbor malice or ill will toward someone to punish them or want to punish them. Why is this important?

Many people will argue that forgiveness automatically implies cessation of the desire or need to punish someone. An excuse or mitigating circumstances may remit the necessity for a punishment, but a reason does not.

A man who downs 10 or 12 beers and plows into a pedestrian on the sidewalk has a reason for his actions, but a man who has a seizure suddenly and does the same thing has an excuse.

All of this to discuss something in the news that has come up on Law & Order. Specific genes have been identified that are linked to violent behavior and rape. The lawyer on the show made a good case. There's a gene that causes cystic fibrosis. If both parents are carriers, the child is 100% likely to develop the disorder. What about "violent" genes? Well, they say other factors come into play. The old nature v. nurture or the mix of the two. Again, a "violence" gene may even be a reason, but not an excuse. A bad childhood might also be a reason, but is it an excuse? i guess that's up to you. Who knows what a jury will decide.

Update

Out of the anti-itch stuff and going crazy.

Desperate for the morning when i can start my steroid pills and call for more of the itch stuff!!!!!

Also, NOT by me...

When someone else says it better...

Setting aside the scandal caused by His Messianic claims and His reputation as a political firebrand, only two accusations of personal depravity seem to have been brought against Jesus of Nazareth. First, that He was a Sabbath-breaker. Secondly, that He was "a gluttonous man and a winebibber, a friend of publicans and sinners"--or (to draw aside the veil of Elizabethan English that makes it sound so much more respectable) that He ate too heartily, drank too freely, and kept very disreputable company, including grafters of the lowest type and ladies who were no better than they should be. For nineteen and a half centuries, the Christian Churches have labored, not without success, to remove this unfortunate impression made by their Lord and Master. They have hustled the Magdalens from the Communion-table, founded Total Abstinence Societies in the name of Him who made the water wine, and added improvements of their own, such as various bans and anathemas upon dancing and theatre-going. They have transferred the Sabbath from Saturday to Sunday, and, feeling that the original commandment "Thou shalt not work" was rather half-hearted, have added to it the new commandment, "Thou shalt not play."

-Dorothy Leigh Sayers (1893-1957), Unpopular Opinions [1946]

Playing House

Ashley and I took these tests to see how good we'd be as a...

1930's Husband...

126 As a 1930s husband, I am Very Superior Take the test!

1930's Wife...

54 As a 1930s wife, I am Average Take the test!

Extra! Extra!

Yes, lots of posts today to make up for the lack over the past week whilst Olympics reign supreme in my "free" time. i will not be qualifying for any Olympic teams this week as per my visit to the doctor today. Yup, you guessed it, i'm pregnant.

Kidding, mom. No, i have been battling poison oak for a week, which has only gotten worse, despite some fantastic home remedies Ashley concocted. The Doctor walked in and i propped up my legs and said, "i think it's poison oak. It's itchy, not weepy, it's getting worse and it's all over our backyard and now mine."

She looked at me with her hands in her pockets, "Yep. i'm gonna give you a steroid pack and steroid creme. Want that now?"

i also asked her about the ear popping thing i've told a bunch of you about. She looked in my ear and said, "Yep, you're right. Fluid. Got Sudafed at home? Take it. Clear ya right up." And apparently all my self-diagnosis and jargon got her curious because she asked, "You got any physicians in the family?"

i said, "Yes, my sister is a nurse and i watch a lot of House." She laughed and said that sounded about right and good luck. So now i am much less itchy and i start my roids tomorrow. Woot!

Reach, throw, row... ooops, no show...

Gotta feel for the Chinese about now. One of their rowing athletes got confused about the time of an event and failed to show up for his single rowing match. This not only disqualified him for the singles, but also for his double match later. Poor guy.

As i was flipping over to the Olympics this evening, i caught the tail end of a show about Hybrid vehicles. As a present for the guest on the show, they ended by giving him a hybrid Ford Escape. This wasn't just any hybrid vehicle though, they explained. This car had calf-skin leather seats and had been "pimped out" with chrome spinners...

(let that sink in)

In case you were wondering, you reduce the eco-friendliness of a vehicle when you add metals to it, especially when you add heavy ones that will reduce the hybrid's improved (only slightly) gas mileage. This is to say nothing of the genuine leather seats or the fact that they are made from baby cows...

My New Hobby

Given the number of friends and family i've had in marching band, this seems like an ideal choice for a new hobby...

Thoughts on Faith

An Inconvenient Truth

i saw a segment on the ever-spiraling downward Daily Show today. They were interviewing this engineer who has dedicated himself to living a petroleum-free life. Not just not driving a car or heating a home, but not using any products that are supported, made, or transported by something that requires petroleum.

This man lives in the woods in a hut. This is a man who makes no sense, for a number of reasons. For one thing, this guy uses the tried and retired method of rubbing two sticks together to make a fire. i can see that using a lighter would be against his principles, but flint has been around for hundreds of years. Seriously. The only reason not to use flint and steel is to make your own life harder.

In addition to this stupidity, he gets a lot of his food from dumpsters and road kill. Now, i could be wrong, but my suspicion is that much of the food that ends up in the Trader Joe dumpster (his dumpster of choice because of its lack of maggots), despite being largely organic, might have arrived by trucks powered by petroleum fuel. i also suspect that much of the road kill is created by cars that might in fact be powered by petroleum too.

What do you prefer to be called?

i saw this posted on Post Secret today and it got me thinking. i've always thought that both the race and gender boxes on surveys and applications should be done away with. i don't think any racial equality will appear until people are forced to make decisions that aren't based on their preconceptions.

Race is a fairly ludicrous idea in and of itself. While certain traits and diseases are more prevalent in groups from specific geographic areas, nothing distinguishes race on the genetic level. A sample of a person's blood will not reveal their "race." It's a human and societal construction.

Race labeling has always been a complicated and often nearly arbitrary practice. Black? African-American? Colored? What about for "whites?" While some people are pretty pasty, "white" people can range from dental white to olive dark, just as "blacks" can range from dark of night to the lightest caramel. People come in a variety of beautiful colors.

So how have we labeled "whites?" Well, "white" is a popular one found on forms, but so is "Caucasian" and "Anglo-Saxon." If you are "white," have you ever stopped to consider why you would be named for a group of people from the mountains of Georgia in Eastern Europe? One German scientist in the 19th Century decided that German skulls resembled one skull from the slopes of a mountain in the Caucuses and concluded that, "I have taken the name of this variety from Mount Caucasus, both because its neighborhood, and especially its southern slope, produces the most beautiful race of men, I mean the Georgian; and because all physiological reasons converge to this, that in that region, if anywhere, it seems we ought with the greatest probability to place the autochthones (birth place) of mankind."

Does this sound like any basis to call all people who fall into the "white-ish" skin tone range Caucasian?

How about Anglo-Saxon? Interestingly, Webster's New World Dictionary that touts itself as "defining American English for fifty years," as well as being the official dictionary of the Associated Press and containing over 12,000 "Americanisms," does not contain an entry that describes this term as applying to all "white people" or anything even close. Wikipedia's dictionary lists 4 definitions and the first several match up with Webster in describing it as a term that refers to a language or the people who originally inhabited Germany. Wikipedia does include an entry that indicates it could refer to someone of British or Northern European descent or a "white" person, but indicates this is only true in the US. i know many people of purely Irish descent or Spanish or Italian or Portuguese would not include themselves in this category.

i think if more people understood the nature of race, or maybe i should say, the mythology of it, and how labels are derived, i'm not sure anyone would identify with a race, or a skin color.

Martin Luther King Jr. said that he dreamed of a day when his children would not be judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character. As long as race and skin color judgments are included on job and college applications and the US Census, we'll be lucky to see that dream come true for his grandchildren.

Grrrrr!

i just read an infuriating article. i was reading a Libertarian news website and came across an article that sounded like my dad wrote it. i'm not sure when this suspicion started, perhaps in the 60's, but somewhere along the line a group of conservatives got together and decided to be anti-environment for the hay of it.

They got together and said, "ok, some of these environmentalists (yack) are commies! They don't want to save the planet! They just wanna hurt my bottom line! They want industry to crash and destitution to rise! They want us to be overrun by other super powers!"

Well, at some point, someone pointed out, "hey, saving the environment is often cost effective! When you don't run your water the entire time you brush your teeth, you save money! When you buy local food that isn't shipped as far, you can save money! When you bike to the local CVS instead of drive your SUV when gas is 4 dollars a gallon, you save money! When you use a Compact Fluorescent energy-saving light bulb or appliance that uses 23% as much energy, you save money!"

At this point, these -- we''l call them capitalists instead of pig heads because it's what they prefer to be called -- stuck their collective thumbs in their ears and went "nnnnuh nuuuuh nuhhhhh, we can't hear you!"

This actually caused many rational people in the conservative camps and many moderates to jump into the ultra liberal boat and head for the shores of a land less polluted and more likely to support life forms known as grandchildren.

"Radicalism in your camp destroys moderatism in mine." This applies to politics, religion, and environmental policy. You want to affect change? Do it wisely and rationally and make a real case for it.

The article i read lambasted what my father calls "greenies" for being anti-capitalist. Think about this for a moment. If we pollute our country and the planet long enough and waste our money and energy resources and employ stop-gap measures for oil problems, we have to send more of our troops to places we get oil from, destroy our national parks, and spend more money than we have to. Seems to me that if you want to destroy capitalism and America, the best way to do it is to ignore environmentalists altogether...

Mean, green, reading machine...

If you read the previous blog and were interested in the Green Lantern, i compiled a list of articles that may pique your interest...

All of these have lots of links and charts if you question how they arrive at particular conclusions

Rolling down the Windows v. Using the A/C in the car

Hand washing v. Using the Dishwasher

Being green on st. Patty's: Cans v. Bottles

Obama v. Clinton v. McCain on Environmental plans (least biased article i've read on all the candidates)

CFL's v. Incandescent Bulbs (by far the best article i've read on the green bulbs, read THIS one if no other article) i'll blog on this later for sure.

If any of these spark you or you have your own question, ask the Green Lantern:

ask.the.lantern@gmail.com

The best 40 minutes in news television...

...are the last 10 minutes of the Daily Show and the whole thirty minutes of the Colbert Report. i stopped watching the Daily show after about sophomore year in college. John Stewart got a long ride on 4 years of Bushisms and it was gloriously funny. Then Bush won again in 2004 and John turned bitter. His only opening jokes were all about Bush. And he had clearly pulled them out of the trash from the previous 4 years. Nothing new. And this time, way less funny. Eight years of "Bush is stupid," just doesn't cut it. He kept up with great guests though on the show.

Last night, John did something unusual. Two things that were completely out of character. One, he deffended a politician (without being sarcastic, although impuning another politician to do it). And two, he stepped into line with rest of the mainstream news world. GASP! What caused this? Obama. Anyone surprised? John's opening TEN MINUTE tirade began and ended as a defense of Obama by attacking McCain.

i'm concerned. One reason obviously is that there's so much good material in making fun of Obama. However, my other big reason is what will poor Johnny do come November if Obama wins? Retire? If he keeps pulling punches on Obama, he'll have no one to make fun of or his jokes will lose their bite in favor of gumming Obama around the edges.

Brian Williams was his guest last night and he was fantastic. The dude is funny. Seriously, funny. He looked John in the eye and told him he was from Jersey and he would open a can of whoop-ass on him if he had to. Didn't bat an eye.

Colbert had a great guest in the middle of the show. This guy who writes for the Green Lantern (click on the link to see an article comparing the envrionmental benefits of soy v. milk) on environmental issues came on to talk about things people try to decide on. Nothing i hadn't heard before, but most people may not have and it made me want to read his column. He discussed how there's so much more to being green than just surface level considerations. Paper or plastic? Well, on the surface, paper, right? Plastic never bio-degrades, strangles sea turtles, etc. Well, yes and no. First off, while paper can be recycled, it often isn't and depletes our forests. It also takes more energy in production to make a paper bag than a plastic one and more energy and fuel are expelled in transporting paper bags (which weigh more) to stores.

Now, he didn't discuss your own reusable bags like the one Ashley made and our canvas sacks, but he had about 3 minutes on the show. He also gave a good rule of thumb that i need to pass on to my misguided eco-cousin, Katie. i've told Ashley before that for gas mileage in the summer, she should put the windows down around town, but it improves it on the highway to put them up and use the A/C. This seems common sense to Ashley and i. The wind resistance on the highway is too high to leave the windows down and lower gas mileage means bad for the environment. The rule of thumb is 45mph. Anything over that and you save by rolling up the windows and turning on that A/C. Anything under and you might as well go for the windows.

He wrapped up by talking about CFL's, the cute little enrgy efficient bulbs my dad was hating on for so long. Everyone is screaming about mercury. He said your only real concern is if you break one and then lick it. But Steven put him in his place and said, "well it's hard not to want to! They look like soft-serve ice cream!"