MAC attack

DEAR GOD! (think that screaming scene in Little Miss Sunshine when the kid discovers he's colorblind) Ok, that's out of my system. My friends who have Macs swear by them. i don't. One of their Mac's has had more problems than a Hugo, but she stands by it, defending it valiantly because it was a first generation model.

So, admittedly, i have some supremely dumb reasons i'm not willing to let go of for never owning a Mac. They include things like being the choice computer of nefarious people in my life, and the unabomber. But i have better reasons, even if you find them shallow. If these obstacles were surmounted, i might be persuaded.

(Note: given the option i'd prolly go LINUX instead of windows or leopard and build my own machine, but it's not so much an option just now. Yes, i'm a third party, second opinion, road less traveled sorta guy)

First off, and this actually is important to me: i think the actual computer looks like it is aimed at 13 year old girls. Mostly the little cute white plastic ones, but even the silver ones. i don't care how durable it is, it looks like i could break it more easily than my cell phone, and i've broken a lot of those.

Also, the interface gives me the same suspicion. It has got to look more rugged or it's a no go. i have to be able to THINK i can throw it into an active volcano, not think that my sister will ask me to paint my toe nails with her if she sees me using it.

The MOST important problem is the lack of a right click on the computer. i use this function so much it would be like peeing with no hands. i could do it, but why the heck WOULD i, if i had another option?

i also find it super counterintuitive that the up AND down scroll buttons are on the bottom of the screen. That just makes no sense to me. That's one of those features i'm convinced they keep on as a means of being different and punishing users for formerly being normal.

Alright Macintosh, you laud yourself on being so daggum customer friendly! The gauntlet is thrown! i married one of your ranks and you woo many more, but until you become user friendly enough for me and rugged enough for Indiana Jones (or at least look like it, i mean even Cadillac has SUV trucks now), you will not sway me!